Gardening Boy
I wanted to give an introduction to each of the Forest Crew. Tune in each week to see updates on your favourite characters, see what great adventures they get up to, and sample a piece of their mind!
What a fantastic person gardening boy is. A great twitcher. See his eyes light up as a buzzard, sparrow or blackbird circles overhead.
He wears a khaki baseball cap, covering his beautiful grey long hair. A fashion conscious dude, who mixes khaki trousers with khaki t-shirts!! We all love gardening boy for his great sense of humour, and he is my confidant. He has advice on everything from birds to boys!!
The other day I asked him for some hot sex tips (although he has not had it in a very long time) and his suggestion blew me away. He advised I get naked and wear a utility belt, a hard hat and be strumming a large vibrating power tool. He said it would get the trucker all hot under the collar!! I've not tried it yet, but theres always time.
Text message of the day: I'm in my room....having been forced to lay down my copy of Graham Green's the third man as I'm closely surrounded by babbling fools disturbing my minds narrative.....I'm finding it increasingly difficult to hold my tongue and tightly coiled muscles......How r u?
Well what comic genius....you don't get them like that everyday do you.......
posted by foresttrips @ 12:55 pm
7 Comments:
I tried that sexual method from the gardening boys diaries series, but the strumming large vibrating power tool came loose and severed my left testicle in half. I had to go to A&E and still have the scars to prove it.
Amourous power tool boy
You WANKER, you obviously didnt read gardening boys diaries clearly. The strumming large vibrating power tool does not come loose if you strap it securley to the utility belt suppied. Unless you bought it from Argos which doesnt supply the belt, you have to purchase it seperatley, I bought mine from Index. The other problem you may have had is you had it on a too higher setting, gardening boys diaries clearly states that for novices do not go higher than setting number 3.You probably had it on a too higher setting and lost control.
Hates people who dont read instructions clearly boy
Hi Instruction boy, thanks for your helpfull comments, yes I did purchase the large vibrating power tool from Argos, but I also purcheased the utility belt too. The problem was that the novice instruction section was crossed out, so I had to guess the setting, and as it went up to ten I thought 3 would be ok.
Amourous power tool boy
You WANKER, I bet you puchased it from the Argos super store, my mate Mad Mickey works there in the warehouse, and when he gets bored he opens up the packaging on the strumming large vibrating power tool and crosses out the novice section. Sorry mate but you must have purchased one of those that he opened, but hes a mate what can you do.
Instruction boy
Hi Instruction boy, thanks for your helfull comments, yes you are right I did purchase the strummimg large vibrating power tool from the Argos superstore out of town, and come to think of it the packaging was torn, thougth the tall male assistant with a scare on his left cheek assured me that nothing had fallen out and that he had personnally checked the items himself.
Amorous power tool boy
You WANKER that was Mad Mickey, tall with a scare on his left cheek, he sometimes helps out on the front till when their short staffed, no wonder he said everything was in order, oh well hes a mate though, what can you do.
Instruction boy
"The strumming large vibrating power tool does not come loose if you strap it securley to the utility belt suppied."
Although I am not the one to wear the he-man tool kit outfit {however, I do adore playing dress-ups!} I must agree with Anonymous. Very important to use the utility belt properly. Also, it is essential that you don't cut corners and get the 'thong-style' utility belt. It may chafe, I have heard tell.
PowerTools are Love
With utmost regards,
Miss Diva
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